The Dangers of Always Trying to Please People: A Gentle Reminder

Repeat after me: “It’s not my job to please anyone or live by their standards.”

Unfortunately, it’s so easy to find ourselves grounded in a routine, around people who, often with the best of intentions, keep us stuck exactly where we are. It comes from concerns about our safety, comfort in knowing exactly what we’re doing, and the belief that they know what’s best for us. Sometimes, they’re right, but what if the things that others want and expect of us don’t line up what we want? The opinions of the people around us are very important to consider before you ultimately decide what you really need.

People Pleaser Controlled

It’s far too common to see people get upset when we assert ourselves and try to repair unhealthy relationship dynamics. We are creatures of habit and many of us are often very comfortable keeping power and social dynamics where they are. Sometimes, this is out of love, while, other times, this is out of fear. Maybe, just even, it’s just even out of habit. Call it part of the human condition, but it’s often more important for people to stay consistent than happy.

But, it’s not your job to please anyone or live by their standards.

As we grow older, a lot of us start to feel a lack of personal control. It’s important to remember just how free you really are when people are not letting you have any fun. If people are infantilizing you and setting you up for a life that you’re not happy with, change it. You set the guidelines to your own life.

This is the one and only time that you will ever have a life. It isn’t a practice run. Don’t wait for permission to live out your days as you choose. There’s no point in dying with regrets.

So many people in the world come from different backgrounds, religions, social mindsets, standards of living, family dynamics, and experiences. Your whole life and all your experiences have brought you to where you are now. There is no one else like you in the whole world. Go be exactly who you want to be.

Are you in control of your path? What advice would you give to those that aren’t? Click HERE and share your story with us.


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